I'm Growing Up - But Am I Normal?
By NORMA FLANAGAN

TIPS FOR 4-H AND YOUTH

Since your last birthday, a lot of things have changed. For one, you're much smarter than you were the year before. That's obvious. Also, you have some new privileges- maybe a later bedtime or a bigger allowance. Whatever the changes, you've probably been expecting them.

But there might have been some other changes - ones that you weren't ready for. Perhaps you've sprouted 3 inches above everyone else in class. Or maybe they all did the sprouting and you still feel like a spud. Maybe you haven't gained a pound and you feel like a feather on the seesaw, or maybe you can't fit into your favorite pair of jeans. And now you're looking in the mirror, thinking only one thing: am I normal.

Everybody's Different

First of all, what's normal? It can't mean the same, that's for sure. If it did, the world would be full of abnormal people! The next time you go to the mall, take a look around. You'll see tall people, short people, and people with broad shoulders, little feet, big stomachs, long fingers, stubby legs, and skinny arms...you get the idea. The truth is, no human being ever came from a cookie cutter, so we all look different. So really, different is normal!

Although we aren't all shaped by the same cookie cutter, your looks are not a matter of chance. They are largely determined by your parents. When your parents created you, they passed on their genes - a kind of special code - and those genes helped to decide your size and shape, your eye color and hair texture, even whether you have freckles. So obviously, there can=t be a right or wrong way to look; there's only your way.

Small or Tall

Height is just one of the millions of features your genes decide. In fact, because you have two parents, your genes act like a referee, giving you a height that usually lands between the height of each parent. If both parents are short, it doesn't necessarily mean you'll be short, but more likely, you'll be somewhere in between the height of your mom and dad. You don't usually get kids who are much taller or smaller than their parents. But genes don't decide everything. Your environment has something to do with how much you grow. For example, eating an unhealthy diet can keep you from growing to your full potential. Getting plenty of sleep, enough exercise, and nutrients are important to your rate of growth.

No doubt you're wondering what the right rate of growth is. It depends. Although on average kids grow about 2 inches a year between age 3 and when they start puberty, there is no exact right rate of growth. What is important is that you progress at a rate that is right for you. And that rate should only be figured out by a doctor, someone who knows how your growth has progressed over the years. Two centimeters here and 2 inches there are not nearly as important as the height you're at now, how you've been growing up to this point, and what other changes your body may be going through.

Don't be scared if you seem to have grown a lot in a very short time. Everyone has a growth spurt during puberty. The average age for starting puberty is about 10 for girls and about 11 for boys, but there's a wide range of normal - between 7 and 13 for girls and 9 and 15 for boys. You'll usually begin to notice that you're growing faster about a year or so after your body starts to show the first changes of puberty - breast development in girls and growth of the testicles and penis in boys. Remember: everybody is different and on slightly different timetables.

Weighing In

The same holds true for weight. With all these different, ever-changing bodies hopping on the scale, the range of what's normal is pretty huge, too. TV and magazines might make us think about what our bodies should weigh and look like, but it's important not to get caught up in comparisons that just don't make sense. You shouldn't try to do unhealthy and dangerous things to your body like those skinny models who starve themselves or professional wrestlers who take drugs to bulk up. What's more important is that you are a healthy weight for you. And healthy is, again, something that should be determined by your doctor.

What to Do If You're Worried

Because you and your friends are at an age where your bodies are going through a lot of changes - with many more to come - you all are bound to be growing and developing at different speeds and in different ways. That's perfectly normal.

If some bullies at school don't see it that way, just remember: you have family's gene code and they have theirs, so you can rest easy in the knowledge your body is growing according to plan. And though it may seem like it's spending a long time at this height or that weight, you wont stay this way forever.

Still worried? If you think your body isn't growing or developing normally, have your mom or dad take you to your doctor. He or she can tell you if anything is wrong. In the meantime, try to keep your mind off your outside appearance-it's mostly taking care of itself. Instead, focus on the inside, because that's the thing that people appreciate the most.