INSTIGATING LOGIC
By JARED PUTNAM

New and improved

Union General Hospital is impressive to say the least. Rebecca Dyer, Mike Gowder, and everyone else involved with the project have helped create a facility that almost feels too nice to even be a hospital. The days of the cold, white, sterile feel of hospitals seem to be fading away in favor of more modern designs that make you feel more comfortable. Although a hospital is not ordinarily a place you want to find yourself, healthcare is a part of life, and it is reassuring to know that we have a top of the line facility serving our area.

Bill the barber's Anniversary Celebration

After 50 years of cutting hair it is time for family, friends, satisfied and disgruntled customers to get together with Bill "the Barber" Kuykendall to joke, have fun, and just generally harass him for any bad haircuts or teasing he has given you over the years. I could tell plenty of my own stories, as Bill is my uncle. Every once in a while I even admit to that. Bill gave me my first haircut and the majority of them since. So please come have some fun this Sunday, August 27, from 2 p.m. 5 p.m. in the Brackett Room behind United Community Bank.

High profile insanity Literally overnight, John Mark Karr, the

man who could be the killer of Jonbenet Ramsey, has become a household name. As much as I dislike stereotyping people, if anyone ever just looked like a child molestor, isn't it this guy? But you have to wonder if he really is guilty, or only wants the attention. Unfortunately that is not too uncommon in high profile cases. One of the nuttiest things I have heard of was when Scott Peterson was convicted of murdering his wife Lacy, then went to prison and was promptly flooded with marriage proposals from women across the country.

Skewering politicians

The Colbert Report (pronounced Col-bear Re-pore) has become one of my favorite shows on television. A spin-off from the The Daily Show with John Stewart, the show airs on Comedy Central and is "anchored" by Steven Colbert, who basically does his best parody of a Fox News analyst. One of the most popular features on the show is the "Know a District" segment, in which a different member of congress is interviewed each time. If you are like me and have a sense of humor about politics, there is nothing quite like listening to Colbert grill a congressman about why he doesn't want his SUV to run off of Caribou meat or hear him try to trick a politician into saying that they want to invade Kuwait.